Harry Potter MixxxTape: Volume 1
Get ur fashio(nerd) nasty ears fed with my Harry Potter mixxxtape! The first 20 fashionasties that message me their address will get a copy sent via owl post. Of course, I’ll make one for you if you’re the 21st or even the 47th wizard as well that contaxxx me! BUTT DON’T BE A MUGGLE & DOWNLOAD THEM URSELF…THAT TAKES ALL THE MAGIK OUT OF IT!!! This post’s goal is to create magik 2gether so plze play each youtube link while you read my answers – and again – send me your address. Enjoy!
I really heart Heart. I really do. Ann’s voice sounds like a witch having an abortion in the woods. Near a cauldron. But like a teenage witch. That’s most important.
Not quite sure what this White Lightnin” implies…moonshine? Blow? I would just like to think that when my patronus ignites, this would be playing. It also is the perfect wizard hangover tune.
Dobby was my favorite so it’s the single moment I scorn J.K. Rowling to muggle damnation. I often picture Harry, Ron, & Hermione downing butterbeers, chain-smoking after Dobby’s death, as the weight of the wizarding world clouds their minds with every puff, and this song comes on the juke box. So depressing, but like, deal with it.
Vintage Cher is so much better than nowadays Cher. I wanted to put Gaga’s ‘Judas’ on here, but I knew all the muggle flack I’d endure, so I’d like to hope that in the biopic of Bellatrix’s life, this would be her “Destroy Everything You Touch” Anna Wintour/Ladytron credit opening entrance.
Normally, heteros kissing gags me, but c’mon, Hermione and Ron’s big kiss was super cute and I love The Shangri-Las. God, the 60s had the best band names too. This song totally breaks my heart because crushes are beautiful and stupid at the same time.
Poor goblins. Griphook was so kooky just like Adam Ant. I feel like this is the goblin’s “Be Prepared” from Lion King.
I don’t get church, but I’d totally knell in Brenda Reid’s pew. This is Pettigrew’s love letter to Voldemort. It also would be funny if this came on every time someone used the Cruciatus curse. Although…unforgiveable curses are not a laughing matter.
Weird. Apparently my computer makes “eight” a smiley face. I can’t change it…You can’t have a Harry Potter mixtape without Stevie. You can’t. And also, if Deathly Hallows had been a weekly teen drama (in the vain of Sweet Valley High or Dawson’s Creek), this would be the show’s theme song and as each character gives their best senior headshot in slow motion, there name would etch across the screen in fuschia.
Originally I wanted this to be for Dobby, but then they sing about stars and eyes and that has Dumbledore written all over it.
You can’t have a Harry Potter mixtape without Kate Bush. In the Deathly Hallows hardcover special edition, Harry, Ron, & Hermione are riding the dragon on the cover so it was probably important to highlight it. Whenever I read the part of them escaping Gringotts, I can hear Kate singing about her dad and Wilheim Reich’s orgon. It also sounds like the Hogwarts express moving forward, like Dumbledore’s Army’s revolution.
Little Anthony’s voice is amazing. I often think in an ideal world, Draco Malfoy would’ve been a nerd nasty with Harry, Ron, & Hermione. Or that he loved Harry. So in the epilogue, I envision this at Draco’s swan song.
When Harry is looking for the Diadem of Ravenclaw, Siouxie’s voice was the only way to go. This song is both epic and eerie. Just like the feeling right before the Battle of Hogwarts.
How magical would it be if this played during the Battle of Hogwarts?
When Mrs. Weasley calls Bellatrix a bitch and kills her, I was like, you go girl. Plus, she was always the meat that kept the sandwich together. Moms are solid and strong and this song is Molly’s “Rocky” moment.
Buffy’s voice is so pretty and so sad. I picture Harry taking off the invisibility cloak and looking death in the face. I bet that would be pretty and sad at the same time.
Whenever Harry’s parents appear, it’s spooky and cute. Just like 100,000 Fireflies. When they come out of the Elder Wand, I always “see” this song happening.
I really wanna do Voldemort drag to this. Vintage Cher (or her writers, rather) was/were on dictactors and their sexual orientations. This song IS Voldemort’s struggle.
Harry Potter is timeless. That’s why songs like this are so perfect. This is Neville’s moment of g(ryffindor)lory…and Nagini’s last. Nagini is obviously Chaka Khan because of the breathing/hissing sounds she makes.
Oh, Snape! The hook says it all.
Albus Severus Potter is the future. So was Mama Cass’s voice.
In my version of the book as a movie, Nina Simone would roll the credits.
Although Warner Bros is marketing Deathly Hallows Part Two as “It All Ends”… it really isn’t fashionasties! There will be my second mixxxtape “Love Songs As Told By Lord Voldemort,” along with a Fashionasty Wizards & Witches Fashion Tips post to prepare you for the midnight movie premiere. AND – naught(y) to speak too soon, butt Sheila & I in the process of churning out at a 7 part Harry Potter zine. GET NERDY!!!
© JAKE THOMPSON