Rather than Guadalajara-ing your poncho and p(f)artaking in some of the racist festivities u will most likely encounter in downtown today fashionasties, celebrate Cinco de (Patti) Mayo(nnaise) instead with: dah dun dah dah dah dun dun dun…
(And Doug Funnie, of course. Duh!)
1). POLKA (UR OWN) SALSA!
Garfield would be offended if u scatted on the healthy notion of sandwich addiction! Don’t act like a manwich between ur thighs isn’t the best lunch substitute on the glitter planet! What’s better than being the bologna in ur wonder bread?! Sprinkle ur spectacle with some polka dot pants & miracle ur own whip! Watash! Now ur ready for step two, fashionasties!
2) BOW TIE PA$TA & TEQUILA!
© JAKE THOMPSON